Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Adjustments
Done with finals for this semester. These past four months of work and school have left me numb. I'm very much done with the whole full time school/full time work schedule. Although it pays the bills, I keep losing my personality later in the semester as I turn on "survival mode" due to stress. I'm gonna talk with my manager about only working full closing 8 hr shifts Thursday-Saturday as a barista. This way, I will not have to work on school nights, not have the stress of a shift, and (most importantly) have enough time to devote to practicing and schoolwork. There's so much more behind all this, but is more personal than what I'd like to post. I hope that the adjustments I will make will be beneficial to my school journey and career.
Monday, December 14, 2009
As P.O.D. Would Say, "Welcome To Hard Times"
It is interesting how much stress individuals can take. We each have our own breaking limit; and over this past month, I've reached and passed mine. This has been easier to get through this with the love and support of my family, but nevertheless is still difficult. It's also interesting how much of stress or difficulty we are willing to let others see. "What will people say?" is something that I briefly covered in my last post. Like I said before, I don't live my life based around others' opinions. But the occasional struggle lays in, "Is the example I'm living, reflect my beliefs, and more importantly, who Jesus is?"
I'm not proud of it, but I don't always do the right thing. Sometimes this is all that is needed to show that someone is going through a difficult time. It's best to sieze an opportunity when someone seems a little jaded, to show him/her more love and acceptance. This may be simply done through a kind action (opening a door for someone, or 'comping' his/her drink) or by saying "Let me know how I can help." I was shown two of these today; thank you Tomas and Chris. It may be all that is needed to shine a little light into his/her valley. This is something that I will also try to practice...when I get out of my valley.
So if this isn't "wearing my emotions on my sleeve," I don't know what is...haha.
This all shows how important to love people really is...inspite of difficulties they are having. We don't really know someone's full story, however joyful or difficult it may be. The important thing is to show love to people, no matter what they are going through.
I'm not proud of it, but I don't always do the right thing. Sometimes this is all that is needed to show that someone is going through a difficult time. It's best to sieze an opportunity when someone seems a little jaded, to show him/her more love and acceptance. This may be simply done through a kind action (opening a door for someone, or 'comping' his/her drink) or by saying "Let me know how I can help." I was shown two of these today; thank you Tomas and Chris. It may be all that is needed to shine a little light into his/her valley. This is something that I will also try to practice...when I get out of my valley.
So if this isn't "wearing my emotions on my sleeve," I don't know what is...haha.
This all shows how important to love people really is...inspite of difficulties they are having. We don't really know someone's full story, however joyful or difficult it may be. The important thing is to show love to people, no matter what they are going through.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
This Response Needed To Be Addressed
Some time ago, Cameron, a blogger responded to my Halloween post. I have not checked my responses for a while because I have been busy with my studies. After reading his response, I was also prompted to respond. Cameron's response is the following paragraph; and my response is below his. These thoughts are very important to me. Thank you for reading.
Cameron's Response:
"I think its a bit unfair to judge someone based on a Halloween costume. To say that a person didn't receive enough love and attention as a child is a bit harsh. Assuming that the parents did not do a good job of raising him/her, and saying you can do better, is pretty self righteous. It's you're opinion and you're entitled to it, but c'mon. Really?! You saw someone's costume and thought to yourself, there is something wrong with her. First of all, its Halloween. One day a year to let loose, be or WEAR something you normally wouldn't. To assume someone does not have self respect based on what they wore once, on the one day to do it, is just plain ignorant. Its not right to judge people, especially if its based on something superficial. If one day you have a daughter, I hope that you teach her that its not how you look or how other look at you that matters. Its how she sees herself that does. And if you have a son, teach him that just because a girl dresses a certain way, it does not mean she is a certain way.I do think you are right about Jesus loving and showing them kindness. But, I also think that blogging about how she has no self respect, and how your future daughter will by wearing the appropriate Halloween costume is not the same. I'm basically saying, stop passing judgement on others before you get to know them. I could come on here and say that 2 guys talking about how they don't like seeing girls in skimpy clothing is just gay...but that would not be very fair of me, would it?"
My Response:
You bring up some interesting perspectives Cameron. I will keep my points brief throughout this response; but I will explain my reasoning so that any future misinterpretations will be avoided. Firstly, I would like to explain that my original post was not at all bashing young women for what they wear. I was not angry when I posted my reflections, instead saddened. By your tone, I am sorry that you feel so offended, I’m sure not offended. Like you said, it is just an opinion. I am keeping your response on my blog because it is something on which others, too, can reflect.
To begin, although the implication is evident, I was focused more on how I am going to raise my children and not how this young lady was raised. With respect, your conclusion and assumption that I think I can do better raising a child is inaccurate and irrelevant. Most children, when ignored or unloved, grow up pursuing other means of attention; and if looks or showing off their body bring that attention, so be it. If looks do not bring attention, then other means will. (Please keep in mind, I am not saying that unloved children are “doomed,” I have hope for anyone).
I apologize if this is too adult for some readers, but going into a coffee shop wearing a slightly see through costume without undergarments is very inappropriate, and is to what I was referring in my blog. Just because Halloween is one day out of the year to “let loose,” it doesn’t mean that all rules of social etiquette are out the door. Sure, Halloween can be fun with costumes and such, but when someone dresses like this, it steps outside of the “fun” mindset and enters into a completely different realm of communication and psychology.
I think some women have much more potential than they think they do. Some women, and by no means all, feel like they need to compensate for this with a need for attention in other areas: i.e. their looks, body, or the showing off of the two in a promiscuous manner.
As ignorant as you accuse me of being, I think most people would agree that this act would not only raise a few eye brows, but also communicate much of how this young lady thinks of herself. I agree with you, it is not right to judge people. I am not saying that she is a horrible person; I do not know her. I know her only by what she communicated through her inappropriate choice of attire. Approximately eighty percent of communication is non-verbal.
I also agree with you when you said, “…it’s not how you look or how others look at you that matters, it is how you see yourself that does.” Well put. I certainly do not base my life on what people think of me. But again, what else is a young lady who dresses like this telling others? It communicates very much; in fact too much for the purposes of this entry.
I am not here to argue; I am here to discuss. I am going to refrain from posting any words of retaliation because “come backs” do absolutely no good for my purpose here. That being said, I will simply ignore the last sentence in your prior response.
The purpose of this entry can be summed up in two sentences:
1) Some young women need to know that they are worth so much more than “just a body.”
2) And honestly, if there was one thing that I could have said to the young lady of whom I speak, it would be, “You are a person who is worth so much more than just a physical shell, and I hope that you can see and believe that someday.”
Cameron's Response:
"I think its a bit unfair to judge someone based on a Halloween costume. To say that a person didn't receive enough love and attention as a child is a bit harsh. Assuming that the parents did not do a good job of raising him/her, and saying you can do better, is pretty self righteous. It's you're opinion and you're entitled to it, but c'mon. Really?! You saw someone's costume and thought to yourself, there is something wrong with her. First of all, its Halloween. One day a year to let loose, be or WEAR something you normally wouldn't. To assume someone does not have self respect based on what they wore once, on the one day to do it, is just plain ignorant. Its not right to judge people, especially if its based on something superficial. If one day you have a daughter, I hope that you teach her that its not how you look or how other look at you that matters. Its how she sees herself that does. And if you have a son, teach him that just because a girl dresses a certain way, it does not mean she is a certain way.I do think you are right about Jesus loving and showing them kindness. But, I also think that blogging about how she has no self respect, and how your future daughter will by wearing the appropriate Halloween costume is not the same. I'm basically saying, stop passing judgement on others before you get to know them. I could come on here and say that 2 guys talking about how they don't like seeing girls in skimpy clothing is just gay...but that would not be very fair of me, would it?"
My Response:
You bring up some interesting perspectives Cameron. I will keep my points brief throughout this response; but I will explain my reasoning so that any future misinterpretations will be avoided. Firstly, I would like to explain that my original post was not at all bashing young women for what they wear. I was not angry when I posted my reflections, instead saddened. By your tone, I am sorry that you feel so offended, I’m sure not offended. Like you said, it is just an opinion. I am keeping your response on my blog because it is something on which others, too, can reflect.
To begin, although the implication is evident, I was focused more on how I am going to raise my children and not how this young lady was raised. With respect, your conclusion and assumption that I think I can do better raising a child is inaccurate and irrelevant. Most children, when ignored or unloved, grow up pursuing other means of attention; and if looks or showing off their body bring that attention, so be it. If looks do not bring attention, then other means will. (Please keep in mind, I am not saying that unloved children are “doomed,” I have hope for anyone).
I apologize if this is too adult for some readers, but going into a coffee shop wearing a slightly see through costume without undergarments is very inappropriate, and is to what I was referring in my blog. Just because Halloween is one day out of the year to “let loose,” it doesn’t mean that all rules of social etiquette are out the door. Sure, Halloween can be fun with costumes and such, but when someone dresses like this, it steps outside of the “fun” mindset and enters into a completely different realm of communication and psychology.
I think some women have much more potential than they think they do. Some women, and by no means all, feel like they need to compensate for this with a need for attention in other areas: i.e. their looks, body, or the showing off of the two in a promiscuous manner.
As ignorant as you accuse me of being, I think most people would agree that this act would not only raise a few eye brows, but also communicate much of how this young lady thinks of herself. I agree with you, it is not right to judge people. I am not saying that she is a horrible person; I do not know her. I know her only by what she communicated through her inappropriate choice of attire. Approximately eighty percent of communication is non-verbal.
I also agree with you when you said, “…it’s not how you look or how others look at you that matters, it is how you see yourself that does.” Well put. I certainly do not base my life on what people think of me. But again, what else is a young lady who dresses like this telling others? It communicates very much; in fact too much for the purposes of this entry.
I am not here to argue; I am here to discuss. I am going to refrain from posting any words of retaliation because “come backs” do absolutely no good for my purpose here. That being said, I will simply ignore the last sentence in your prior response.
The purpose of this entry can be summed up in two sentences:
1) Some young women need to know that they are worth so much more than “just a body.”
2) And honestly, if there was one thing that I could have said to the young lady of whom I speak, it would be, “You are a person who is worth so much more than just a physical shell, and I hope that you can see and believe that someday.”
Monday, November 2, 2009
A Note on Girls' Halloween Costumes Last Night
This is all that I'm gonna say on this one...
(and by the way, I'm putting this as nice as possible):
I am going to be a father who loves his daughter (if I have one someday) and teaches her to respect herself.
...Enough said?
(and by the way, I'm putting this as nice as possible):
I am going to be a father who loves his daughter (if I have one someday) and teaches her to respect herself.
...Enough said?
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Loving People
During my reflecting time the other day, I realized something significant to my perspective, life, walk with God, and how I treat others. Even though we are all not brothers and sisters of the same family, I am called to love people (love your neighbor). But how can I love everyone? How did Jesus do it? How did he view people? So I changed my perspective and thought of people belonging to one family, my family; and it has given me a better perspective of how to treat people with more love. This includes the guy who cut me off on the road this morning, or the girl customer at work who treats me inferiorly because she's rollin' in a newly-leased Beemer, or the homeless person outside 7-11 asking for money to buy dinner, or the person I can't communicate with because he speaks another language. I share two of the greatest things in common with all of these people: we are human and God loves everyone of us.
These past few days, I've been thinking how much we, as people, all have in common, and it's kind of boggling my mind. So here's what really got to me: If I think of everybody as brothers and sisters, part of the same family, then how much differently will I think of the people who steal from me! What a radical change of perspective.
So here's the "getter": If God loves everyone of us, (and I couldn't comprehend this), how much would it please Him that I love the same people too. How much would it please Him that I show the same people he loves, mercy? How much would it please Him that I show them forgiveness and grace instead of frustration? Is that what we were made to do? Would that make a difference? Would that show people Jesus? I hope so, because I hope to please God.
These past few days, I've been thinking how much we, as people, all have in common, and it's kind of boggling my mind. So here's what really got to me: If I think of everybody as brothers and sisters, part of the same family, then how much differently will I think of the people who steal from me! What a radical change of perspective.
So here's the "getter": If God loves everyone of us, (and I couldn't comprehend this), how much would it please Him that I love the same people too. How much would it please Him that I show the same people he loves, mercy? How much would it please Him that I show them forgiveness and grace instead of frustration? Is that what we were made to do? Would that make a difference? Would that show people Jesus? I hope so, because I hope to please God.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Beautiful World
I've had quite some time to watch TV in between naps while being sick this week. Currently, one of my favorite channels is the nature channel. The other day, there was a show on about some intense explorers that got me thinkin' how awesome this world is in which we live.
I read a book not too long ago entitled Wild at Heart. Although there are some things that I don't 100% agree with, most of it is pretty 'spot on'. One subject author John Eldredge talks about is the one thing that is hardwired into the hearts of men: The need for exploration. This is true for me. Everytime I'm biking an unfamiliar mountain trail, it fills me with this rush of "gotta keep going" and "I know something beautiful is just around this next hill." Ten miles later I realized that I've spent all my energy getting there and not saved enough to turn around, just because I couldn't stop taking in all the new sights. Granted, it doesn't take being a man to appreciate the newness and beauty this world has to offer.
Here is what struck my brain while I was watching the nature channel's most extreme explorers: With all of our technological advances, and all the thousands of years humans have been exploring, we daily continue to discover so many new and exciting things about this planet. Even the little things like how every sunset is different, every rain fall is different, every season differs from the year prior...there are so many things that I take for granted that shouldn't be. It blows me away that after all this time, humans have not grown tired of this earth. It just left me in awe. Then it made me think how depressed humans would be if we knew everything about our environment and became bored with it. But that isn't who we were made to be (cue Switchfoot's "Meant To Live"). This world is such a wonderful gift. It's a gift of changing beauty, of which we sometimes need to be reminded.
I hope this reminds us to let nature's beauty make us smile again and to take enjoyment in such a wonderful creation: our home.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
First Day of School
First day back to the good 'ole SJSU. God provided today in soooo many ways.
God Provided Part 1: My music history teacher said that the music dept could not add any students for any reason b/c they would get fined by the university for any additional students (due to cut-backs). A few students (including myself) spoke with the professor after class and he said he'd see what he can do to add us. I just put it in God's hands and asked Him what I should do if I wasn't supposed to take the class. Anywho, I later saw the professor in the hallway and he said that he cleared it with the dean of the dept that we could actually add the class. I heard trumpets sound because of the good news. I really needed this class to carry on with my degree, so that was so awesome that I was let into the class =).
God Provided Part 2: When I got back to my car after class (around 11:30am), a gal who parked right next to me, saw me headed for my car and said, "Oh, is this your car?" "Yeah, why?" "Oh ok, well I left a note on your windshield this morning about what happened...but after you left, a girl totally hit your car while driving into the space next to you. She didn't see me, so she backed out and parked in another spot 6 spaces down and didn't leave a note. I guess she was hoping that you wouldn't find out. I wrote this note as a witness to what happened and left her plate and model/make of her car." "Wow! No way, you actually did that? That's so nice of you, bless you!" "Yeah, you're welcome."
I just couldn't believe that someone would uphold such an avenger (need to have justice served) attitude...I really admired that. I was driving away when I got a feeling like I should file a police report at the "scene." It so happened that I missed my exit to get on the freeway and I was headed back to the parking lot anyway...so I said, "Ok God I hear ya." When I got there I called the campus police who came and filed a report. It turns out that I don't have collision coverage on my car (just the basics). So I filed the police report just to be paid for the damage and not to seek revenge or anything for the girl who hit me (which didn't even cross my mind). I asked the officer what the charges would be against the other driver. She told me that a hit-and-run is considered a misdemeanor and ordered that a wheel boot (immobilization device) be secured on her wheel so she couldn't drive anywhere...I actually saw them put it on (serious stuff). I really did feel bad that the other driver would be in "it" so deep, 'cause all I really wanted was just reimbursement for my car's damage; but I guess the other driver shouldn't have been so shady as to park somewhere else to avoid trouble.
So yeah, someone at Starbucks said, "Dang man, you're really goin' through it lately huh...bike, tickets, accidents?!" And all I could say and think about was how impressed, grateful, and blessed I was with the gal who did leave a note. I can honestly say that today was a blessing more than a disappointment! So thank you, God for today...thank you!
God Provided Part 1: My music history teacher said that the music dept could not add any students for any reason b/c they would get fined by the university for any additional students (due to cut-backs). A few students (including myself) spoke with the professor after class and he said he'd see what he can do to add us. I just put it in God's hands and asked Him what I should do if I wasn't supposed to take the class. Anywho, I later saw the professor in the hallway and he said that he cleared it with the dean of the dept that we could actually add the class. I heard trumpets sound because of the good news. I really needed this class to carry on with my degree, so that was so awesome that I was let into the class =).
God Provided Part 2: When I got back to my car after class (around 11:30am), a gal who parked right next to me, saw me headed for my car and said, "Oh, is this your car?" "Yeah, why?" "Oh ok, well I left a note on your windshield this morning about what happened...but after you left, a girl totally hit your car while driving into the space next to you. She didn't see me, so she backed out and parked in another spot 6 spaces down and didn't leave a note. I guess she was hoping that you wouldn't find out. I wrote this note as a witness to what happened and left her plate and model/make of her car." "Wow! No way, you actually did that? That's so nice of you, bless you!" "Yeah, you're welcome."
I just couldn't believe that someone would uphold such an avenger (need to have justice served) attitude...I really admired that. I was driving away when I got a feeling like I should file a police report at the "scene." It so happened that I missed my exit to get on the freeway and I was headed back to the parking lot anyway...so I said, "Ok God I hear ya." When I got there I called the campus police who came and filed a report. It turns out that I don't have collision coverage on my car (just the basics). So I filed the police report just to be paid for the damage and not to seek revenge or anything for the girl who hit me (which didn't even cross my mind). I asked the officer what the charges would be against the other driver. She told me that a hit-and-run is considered a misdemeanor and ordered that a wheel boot (immobilization device) be secured on her wheel so she couldn't drive anywhere...I actually saw them put it on (serious stuff). I really did feel bad that the other driver would be in "it" so deep, 'cause all I really wanted was just reimbursement for my car's damage; but I guess the other driver shouldn't have been so shady as to park somewhere else to avoid trouble.
So yeah, someone at Starbucks said, "Dang man, you're really goin' through it lately huh...bike, tickets, accidents?!" And all I could say and think about was how impressed, grateful, and blessed I was with the gal who did leave a note. I can honestly say that today was a blessing more than a disappointment! So thank you, God for today...thank you!
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Wow...really?
So I was checkin out the B.A.R.F stolen bike postings and I saw a post from the guy who used to work on my old bike. His trailer with two bikes (along with some gear) were stolen from right in front of his repair shop. Seriously?? People would actually steal bikes from a guy who fixes them for a living? I don't really get that, but I guess that it doesn't really matter to people. Anyway, just some random information. Next post will be much lighter =)
Friday, August 21, 2009
Starbucks Shinanigans Make Me Laugh
I was on bar last night at work when a younger gal came in and ordered a Strawberry Banana Smoothie. After receiving her drink and having a seat with her boyfriend, she immediately came back up to the register and exclaimed in a repulsive manner, "Yeah, umm...This drink is disgusting!" I chuckled a bit to myself as I mentally asked, "Did she really say that?" I asked her in a sad, kiddingly tone, "Why are you calling something that I poured my heart and soul into making, disgusting?" She didn't really catch on and responded with, "Because it is! Yeah, I thought it was going to taste a lot better than this! Can you make me another drink!" I think I actually laughed out loud to her response and said, "Yeah, sure. What would ya like?"
After we made her another drink and she sat down, I looked over at my co-workers and asked, "Did that really happen?" "Uh...yeah!" they remarked. Laughing through it all, I was more dumbfounded than offended. It was definately the most funny moment of the evening.
After we made her another drink and she sat down, I looked over at my co-workers and asked, "Did that really happen?" "Uh...yeah!" they remarked. Laughing through it all, I was more dumbfounded than offended. It was definately the most funny moment of the evening.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
The Art of Weaving
Life is full of re-adjusting one's perspective. I've found that this has been a common theme for my life these past few weeks. One major area has been loving and accepting people in spite of frustrations. (This includes all areas of my life and is not referring to one particular event, more importantly not one specific person).
One word that I continuously hear God whispering to me, in regards to relationships, is "patience." This led me to question the line(s) between "having patience for people," "holding people accountable," "judging someone's actions," and "how to react in the midst of disappointment." Then, looking in the mirror, evaluate at my own actions; do I keep my promises? I understand that God's love, forgiveness, and patience is key. On the other hand, I've always been someone to say, "Hey...that's not right." But when should we excercise these two [different??] views? Also, if God's timing is perfect, should we really be disappointed with people? Should we accept circumstances as God's timing/plan instead of someone letting us down? View of a bigger picture? Yes! But I couldn't really find these comparisons in the Bible. I know that God wants us to love Him and show His love to others; but people aren't perfect (actually I'm referring to myself), in which reveals my struggle. I don't know the answers to these questions. So I guess I am writing this for participation reasons. Participation, in hope that you apply these questions to your own life, or leave feedback for me to apply to mine. Thanks for reading =)
Post Script:
I want to have faith in and love people, but more importantly, God. It's like a dance...listening to God's direction while weaving this with, or applying it to, other relationships.
One word that I continuously hear God whispering to me, in regards to relationships, is "patience." This led me to question the line(s) between "having patience for people," "holding people accountable," "judging someone's actions," and "how to react in the midst of disappointment." Then, looking in the mirror, evaluate at my own actions; do I keep my promises? I understand that God's love, forgiveness, and patience is key. On the other hand, I've always been someone to say, "Hey...that's not right." But when should we excercise these two [different??] views? Also, if God's timing is perfect, should we really be disappointed with people? Should we accept circumstances as God's timing/plan instead of someone letting us down? View of a bigger picture? Yes! But I couldn't really find these comparisons in the Bible. I know that God wants us to love Him and show His love to others; but people aren't perfect (actually I'm referring to myself), in which reveals my struggle. I don't know the answers to these questions. So I guess I am writing this for participation reasons. Participation, in hope that you apply these questions to your own life, or leave feedback for me to apply to mine. Thanks for reading =)
Post Script:
I want to have faith in and love people, but more importantly, God. It's like a dance...listening to God's direction while weaving this with, or applying it to, other relationships.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
"Baby Come Back..."
Last week, believe it or not was awesome! I had a real peace about the bike being gone. However, these past few days, I've been havin a real hard time with that fact. I understand that it's all just "stuff," but it's just difficult knowing that an "escape" or "hobby" of mine was taken from me. Bikes always turn my head, literally. And now I also think, "What if that one's mine." I love riding and I miss it sooooo much. Dang, I just have to keep forcing myself to think that I just can't ride for a long time for whatever reason. Anyway, it's been on my mind and again I miss riding soooo much. "Baby Come Back"
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Wisdom Please...(sorry for the similar theme)
The day after my bike was stolen, I filed a report with security at my apartment complex. After completing the report, the security guard said, "Huh, that's interesting...two days ago a tenant called in reporting he had seen someone tampering with his motorcycle late at night." "Are you serious?!" I responded. "Why didn't you warn or notify tenants who have motorcycles about that?" "Well, if we notified tenants of every report we received, you'd have 20 messages per day on your door." "Well I'd rather have 20 messages on my door, than a stolen vehicle." "Yeah...well..."
I'm not just saying this because of the whole hindsight 20/20 thing, but if security notified me that people were checking out or tampering with motorcycles on the premises, I wouldn't have taken any chances with it and kept my bike garaged at a friend's house or in storage until security did something about the problem.
This is what's frustrating about the whole thing: the incident would have been prevented if security notified motorcyclists that people were checking out bikes. So who's at fault? The thieves yes, but is security also liable for it, since they knew about it? I'm struggling with the correct action to take about it all. I've considered mediation to resolve security's notifying tenants of suspicious activity, to create an awareness. An extreme consideration is having the complex pay for part of the damage. This action however would initiate a wide range of problems, which is heartache I would rather avoid. This has been my thought struggle this week. I think I'm only going to voice my frustration to the office manager in person and to the complex owner in a letter, so that possibly an incident in the future like this could be prevented.
I'm not just saying this because of the whole hindsight 20/20 thing, but if security notified me that people were checking out or tampering with motorcycles on the premises, I wouldn't have taken any chances with it and kept my bike garaged at a friend's house or in storage until security did something about the problem.
This is what's frustrating about the whole thing: the incident would have been prevented if security notified motorcyclists that people were checking out bikes. So who's at fault? The thieves yes, but is security also liable for it, since they knew about it? I'm struggling with the correct action to take about it all. I've considered mediation to resolve security's notifying tenants of suspicious activity, to create an awareness. An extreme consideration is having the complex pay for part of the damage. This action however would initiate a wide range of problems, which is heartache I would rather avoid. This has been my thought struggle this week. I think I'm only going to voice my frustration to the office manager in person and to the complex owner in a letter, so that possibly an incident in the future like this could be prevented.
Crazy
So last Sunday night after all its events had unfolded, I wrote about a peace that I felt. I got a really strong feeling that it was to prevent something from happening; in particular a ride that I was going to take with my friend to Half Moon Bay the following Friday. I've learned to just "go with" that gut feeling no matter how crazy it sounds, but it didn't occur until after Sunday night. The crazy thing about it is when I told my friend about that feeling, she replied with, "Wow, I actually had a dream before Sunday that we were taking this trip in a car...and I hardly ever remember any of my dreams." That kinda tripped me out a bit, whatever it meant...I still know that nothing could have been prevented...so I thought...
Monday, July 20, 2009
Bike Was Stolen Today
Tonight (Sunday) my bike was stolen. I came inside at 9:40pm to watch Back To The Future II with a friend and roommate and went back outside at 11:30pm to find my bike had been stolen. I'm doing alright with it for now...I guess you could say that I have a "peace" about it; but there are a couple of things that make me angry about the whole thing.
1) To me, stealing is the lowest form of gut-less-ness that someone can stoop down to. Planning, hiding and taking something from another person is completely cowardice...seriously, what is that?
2) I was away from the bike for less than two hours. That's not really a "Hey let's cruise around the neighborhood to see what shmuck's stuff we can steal;" it's more of an, "Ok he just left his bike out and we know that he'll be back to take his friend home, there are patrolling security guards, and residents living 15 feet away from the parking space are still up and have their lights on and windows open, so let's make this quick and quiet guys." It really creeps me out that people are capable of a stalker-like mind set. What the crap? Have you been watching me or what? This made me think that there's pretty much nothing that I could have done in order to prevent this from happening. It would have been stolen sooner or later, especially when people are that thorough.
3) I've worked hard for my stuff. And seriously, if you want something like that sooo much, why don't ya get up off it, and freakin' get a job so you can "get your own bag." Honestly, guys like that need to grow some, be a man, and start being responsible. It's like we're back in elementary school, taking lunch money from other kids...ugh...grow up.
4) I'm paying off a bike that someone else is riding?! Yeah...I don't get that one. Shouldn't they be punished for stealing instead of my paying off the stolen item for them? It's kinda like buying something for a thief...with monthly payments..."awesome."
All this being said, the ultimate thing that I keep thinking about is how sick people have become. And seriously, stealing something like that??...on a Sunday??...ugh! I know that God has his reasons for letting things happen. And shoot, maybe it was stolen to prevent me from being in a bad accident. . . I really don't know. But all I can do is trust in God's plan for me...whatever that may be. All this stuff is gonna burn anyway. And I have no interest in a thief ruining one moment of my life. Sorry, but they're not really worthy of that kind of control. I've accepted that it's gone, it's just the beginning of another chapter in my life, that's all. Like I've said before, it's ok to have toys in life (to have fun), but it's not ok to let them control the owner or change him/her. I wish I had answers to this whole thing. I wish that that bike was recovered and whoever stole it be punished. But in all honesty, someone much bigger is the judge. And more importantly, it's God's plan...not mine. So all I can do is "Continue in Him," and not let recovering some "thing" become an obsession.
I'm learning more and more each day that this life contains so much more than the tiny-little box we try to fit it in. I actually feel sorry for the people that stole my bike. I feel sorry that they're not living joyfully. I feel sorry that they don't know how to bring joy to others, only heartache. What kind of a life is that? A life that deserves prayer more than anything. I'll welcome prayer too. Everyday is full of challenges and the repetitive need to forgive.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Adventurer
Yesterday (Sunday) was my first day back to Skyline for a long time. I just wanna say that I love mountain biking! It brings out a side of me that doesn't come out in San Jose that much: care-free, adventurous, happy, and daring. There's just something about the "unknown" of adventure that excites me. I come alive out there and when I just let go and not worry it seems like God says, "Welcome back." Every time I bike up there, I always find something that makes me say, "Wow! God you're good." It makes me hope that someday I could share this with someone, which would be one of the greatest gifts.
The picture is of my favorite trail called Hawk Trail. It's made of a lot of dirt mounds that can effectively launch a biker pretty high in the air. Midway through I questioned its power, "That all you got, Hawk?!" I exclaimed. Three seconds later I mis-landed a high jump and could tell that I was going to end up on the dirt. I was a really smooth fall...one of those slow motion kinds where I could think through how to fall. No open wounds or bruises, which might have been due to my wearing launch pads during the trip. I got up and chuckled out loud, "Alright . . . nice . . . yeah, ok." I got my kicks and slowed down a little after that. Good times.
So...being my first day back, ATF I realized that I was over-ambitious in planning my trip. I was determined to bike to a particular secluded meadow at the end of the west trails that I've been to before. When I got there, I found that the short green grass grew into tall dry grass over the months, and was far from inviting for a place to sit and read. I took a little break none-the-less.
Biking there, just about wiped out my energy supply. On the way back up the trail, I walked most of the way. I don't think I've ever been that drained of energy. You know you're not looking too good when you're depending on your water to give you strength. I wanted to bike back along the trail to my car just to say, "I did it." But realistically, all that seemed to matter was simply, "getting back." I made it to the farthest north trail entrance along HWY 9 and decided to bike the rest of way along the highway. I wish I had more energy to bike the trail back, because I wasn't done having fun yet. But maybe next time I'll pack a lunch, and definately be in better shape. Good stuff and I can't wait to do it again!
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Last Monday Made Me Smile
I said that I'd write about some things that made my day during the week, this is one of them. (However, I'm not going to disclose names...not that it matters anyway).
There are a few customers who make my day when they come into the store; one being a gentleman in his late 40's who always buys a pound of Decaf Espresso every Monday night and his nightly triple grande latte around 9:30pm. Sometimes he lets his kids come along on his coffee run, Monday being one of those times. All of his kids are well mannered and it's evident that there is a lot of love in that family. His one daughter (the oldest maybe in 4th grade) is the cutest little button ever. His second oldest (maybe in second grade) yup...his sly smile reminded me of my brother when we were little. The youngest was maybe in kindergarten...cute kid.
"You guys keepin' Dad company tonight?" As if prompted to respond in one accord, "YES....," they said. "We were just at the grocery store...did you know that they give away free samples of cookies in the bakery sometimes?" Thinking of my brother, I chuckled and said, "Well when my brother and I were little, I used to ask him to get the cookie samples because I was too shy." Excitement filled their feet with nervous shuffling when the oldest asked with an inviting smile, "Well we could get you a cookie if you wanted." "Awe...that's sweet of you, but you don't have to do that," I responded thankfully. This evoked a couple random jump spirts of excitement from the two boys as the oldest said, "It's ok...maybe we could."
They left waving "bye" and smiling. I think their Dad was getting a kick out of this as much as I was. The excitement and joy from those silly kids warmed my heart. About 10 minutes later I hear a "Hey!" I looked up as she said, "We brought you a cookie!" offering the present with two hands in front of her....dang, it felt like someone just gave me the world.
"Aaaawwe...'no-way,'" I said surprisingly, through the most joyful smile I've had in a long time. "That's soooo sweet of you...awe." "I said I'd get one for you," she said with a smile. Her Dad was smiling too, only with pride; blessed to know about his daughter's giving heart. I thanked them again and waved goodbye as they left.
Even today, I still can't get over how awesome that was! I haven't felt like that in a long time! Being, by far, the most difficult week of school ever, I took that moment with open arms.
There are a few customers who make my day when they come into the store; one being a gentleman in his late 40's who always buys a pound of Decaf Espresso every Monday night and his nightly triple grande latte around 9:30pm. Sometimes he lets his kids come along on his coffee run, Monday being one of those times. All of his kids are well mannered and it's evident that there is a lot of love in that family. His one daughter (the oldest maybe in 4th grade) is the cutest little button ever. His second oldest (maybe in second grade) yup...his sly smile reminded me of my brother when we were little. The youngest was maybe in kindergarten...cute kid.
"You guys keepin' Dad company tonight?" As if prompted to respond in one accord, "YES....," they said. "We were just at the grocery store...did you know that they give away free samples of cookies in the bakery sometimes?" Thinking of my brother, I chuckled and said, "Well when my brother and I were little, I used to ask him to get the cookie samples because I was too shy." Excitement filled their feet with nervous shuffling when the oldest asked with an inviting smile, "Well we could get you a cookie if you wanted." "Awe...that's sweet of you, but you don't have to do that," I responded thankfully. This evoked a couple random jump spirts of excitement from the two boys as the oldest said, "It's ok...maybe we could."
They left waving "bye" and smiling. I think their Dad was getting a kick out of this as much as I was. The excitement and joy from those silly kids warmed my heart. About 10 minutes later I hear a "Hey!" I looked up as she said, "We brought you a cookie!" offering the present with two hands in front of her....dang, it felt like someone just gave me the world.
"Aaaawwe...'no-way,'" I said surprisingly, through the most joyful smile I've had in a long time. "That's soooo sweet of you...awe." "I said I'd get one for you," she said with a smile. Her Dad was smiling too, only with pride; blessed to know about his daughter's giving heart. I thanked them again and waved goodbye as they left.
Even today, I still can't get over how awesome that was! I haven't felt like that in a long time! Being, by far, the most difficult week of school ever, I took that moment with open arms.
Study Update...
All-nighter successful. I'm alert, but we'll see how much stuff I'm able to cover for the final. Didn't get all the material, but a little is better than taking an F, or giving up. I'll keep ya posted. Thanks for the prayer!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
God Is Good...
Dang...everyday this week has been made. Little things in life I guess, but still...they're big to me. I'm on the "Gotta Keep Going" train right now, and have two more days until I'm home free. Things are good, life is in perspective, my days are bright, and I feel blessed beyond belief. Thank you all for your prayers! I'll knock out a big update at the end of the week. Gotta get to practicing now...sax jury at 2:45pm. Thanks again =)
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Doing Great...Will Do Better With Prayer...
Again, I will keep this brief. Gotta finish up a long paper that I've been working on for a while. Work's been good but I'm scheduled 40 hours (5 days) from last Thursday-this Tuesday straight. I'm getting stuff done and staying very positive. Please just pray for sleep at night (last night was rough) and alertness while I work on my studies. It'd help out a whole bunch. I'll have time to breathe after next Thursday (my last final), and let ya'll know how everything went. Thanks guys!
-Chris
-Chris
Encouraged
I'll write more about it later, but I am blessed and encouraged this weekend. Kinda nice when an absolute stranger has a dramatically positive impact on personal life perspective. Have crazy homework/papers/practicing to do for next week finals and juries, but I'll get there...just a matter of time. More to come about all this next week...
Monday, May 4, 2009
Busy Week List
- I got my phone fixed today (yeay)
- Got car insurance again (after a 2 month lapse...yikes, but need to have pictures taken again)
- Getting apartment ready for a moving out inspection
- Fixing an error on my IRS Return =(
- Fixing an error on my home phone bill =(
- Fixing my student loan ( Need to talk with Wells Fargo and Financial Services at SJSU. They started to bill me early) =(
- Send tux shirt for dry cleaning for concert Friday
- Practicing for master class performance tomorrow night
- Practicing for concert Friday night
- Working 36 hours this week (yikes)
- Doing tons of homework and papers
- Cooking/cleaning/laundry/bills
Ugh...almost home...gotta get there
- Got car insurance again (after a 2 month lapse...yikes, but need to have pictures taken again)
- Getting apartment ready for a moving out inspection
- Fixing an error on my IRS Return =(
- Fixing an error on my home phone bill =(
- Fixing my student loan ( Need to talk with Wells Fargo and Financial Services at SJSU. They started to bill me early) =(
- Send tux shirt for dry cleaning for concert Friday
- Practicing for master class performance tomorrow night
- Practicing for concert Friday night
- Working 36 hours this week (yikes)
- Doing tons of homework and papers
- Cooking/cleaning/laundry/bills
Ugh...almost home...gotta get there
Sunday, April 19, 2009
People Are Funny - Part 1003
I forgot to write about this, and those in customer service will find a good laugh from this story (I'll write in the present tense, though this happened a couple weeks back).
Today I was 'drink engineer,' making drinks on bar. A little chica came in and (I guess) she thought it to be a good idea to show off her 'cute' dog by walking it right on inside the store. [Note: I still don't understand why people bring animals inside public buildings]. Not having her attention yet, I said, "That's a cute dog (which was far from the truth, but I needed to be nice), but we actually don't allow animals inside the store because..." And right before I could finish my sentence, the dog lifted his leg and peed all over our display and floor. I finished my sentence with, "...for that very reason." The girl didn't say anything, just tugged on the dog to make him stop and waited outside until her boyfriend came out with their drinks. There was no, "I'm sorry...can I clean that up for you," or anything of the sort. I'm sure you all could imagine what I was thinking. People are funny I guess <--- put nicely. "Ooops, you needed that 6 shot espresso so you could stay awake to write that paper?" I'm kicking myself that I thought she wanted decaf...sorry.
Today I was 'drink engineer,' making drinks on bar. A little chica came in and (I guess) she thought it to be a good idea to show off her 'cute' dog by walking it right on inside the store. [Note: I still don't understand why people bring animals inside public buildings]. Not having her attention yet, I said, "That's a cute dog (which was far from the truth, but I needed to be nice), but we actually don't allow animals inside the store because..." And right before I could finish my sentence, the dog lifted his leg and peed all over our display and floor. I finished my sentence with, "...for that very reason." The girl didn't say anything, just tugged on the dog to make him stop and waited outside until her boyfriend came out with their drinks. There was no, "I'm sorry...can I clean that up for you," or anything of the sort. I'm sure you all could imagine what I was thinking. People are funny I guess <--- put nicely. "Ooops, you needed that 6 shot espresso so you could stay awake to write that paper?" I'm kicking myself that I thought she wanted decaf...sorry.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Aye yai yai
I'm all homeworked out. Today I started my homework journey at 12:30pm in Cupertino's Starbucks, and just finished (6:50pm). I'm pooped. Gotta go home to practice, clean, cook, do laundry, taxes, financial aid, and get some days off at work for June. Dang...does it ever end? I probably won't get to all of those, but it's my never ending list of "stuff". Gotta go and start another crazy week. As Levar Burton would say, "I'll see ya next time."
But I'll Try Focusing on the Good
Today I went riding over to the Cupertino Starbucks I usually visit. On the way, my backpack came unzipped so I pulled over on the side of the freeway. As I was ready to get back on the road, a car pulled over in front of me. At first I was going to go, but the thought, "He might be pulling over for me," crossed my mind. The man stepped out of his car and started walking towards me. As I pulled forward to meet him, he asked, "Everything alright?" "Yeah, thank you for asking, everything's fine," I responded. I told him why I pulled over and blessed him for pulling over.
The rest of the way to Starbucks, I kept repeating, "That totally blows my mind!" I thank God for that moment. It lifted my spirits. Ok, so there are good people, and I'll gladly accept what happened today with open arms.
The rest of the way to Starbucks, I kept repeating, "That totally blows my mind!" I thank God for that moment. It lifted my spirits. Ok, so there are good people, and I'll gladly accept what happened today with open arms.
Friday, March 6, 2009
Ok . . . a little about me, maybe considered venting...wait let me get my soapbox. I wish we could wear our values on our sleeves. One that I would wear is, "Values Kept Promises." If I make plans or tell someone that I'm going to do something or be somewhere, I plan to follow through with it. I grow tired of folding or flaking becoming "the norm." I value my time and I value other peoples' time.
Last week I was given the invitation to a movie. It just so happened that I had the evening free (the first time since January). I was looking forward to getting out and enjoying some time with friends, away from my busy schedule. When I called to finalize the plans for the evening, my two calls and texts went unanswered. I waited about four hours and still no response. Urgently, I called my friends to fill the extracurricualr time void. Luckily, one of my friends did not have any plans, so I secured some time. (To this day, I never heard back from this person).
This says two things to me...1) "I don't think you're time is important." 2) "I don't think you're important for an apology." Excuse my french, but these two slaps in the face pisses me off. I graciously accepted an invitation and made time for someone, and this is the thank you I receive. If this happened once, I would chaulk this speach up to an over-reaction. But it is not the case. Time after time my plans are discarded as nothing more than an inconvenience. I am becoming annoyed with the non-shalaunt [spelling??] attitude and trend of flaking. Making a promise is the same as attaching a personal stamp-of-approval or signature on something, which should be followed through. Especially upon seeing that person again. Grow some, and apologize. Flaking says so much about someone (more than they know or can comprehend).
This brings to question what do values mean? They are something that someone holds close to his/her heart. I understand that I cannot "force" my values on someone else. All I can do is stick to mine. When someone doesn't uphold similar values, I accept that. But when someone's values aren't respected, it's not respecting that person; and that's ultimately what I have a problem with. So, let me put this as ""socially acceptable"" as I can..."It's not the other person's problem that you're having a problem with that person's value differences." Which is nothing but a big pile.
I know that I am preaching to the choir, and that this isn't news to any of you; but it is something that I wish I can tell people about me, right-off-the-bat. My mood for this week, if you haven't guessed, is "Disappointed With People;" because it's becoming absolutely rare to find people who follow through. I guess this would be a good time to tell Joe that I'm sorry about not showing up for rock climbing in Yosemite 5 months ago. (Satire in italics)
Last week I was given the invitation to a movie. It just so happened that I had the evening free (the first time since January). I was looking forward to getting out and enjoying some time with friends, away from my busy schedule. When I called to finalize the plans for the evening, my two calls and texts went unanswered. I waited about four hours and still no response. Urgently, I called my friends to fill the extracurricualr time void. Luckily, one of my friends did not have any plans, so I secured some time. (To this day, I never heard back from this person).
This says two things to me...1) "I don't think you're time is important." 2) "I don't think you're important for an apology." Excuse my french, but these two slaps in the face pisses me off. I graciously accepted an invitation and made time for someone, and this is the thank you I receive. If this happened once, I would chaulk this speach up to an over-reaction. But it is not the case. Time after time my plans are discarded as nothing more than an inconvenience. I am becoming annoyed with the non-shalaunt [spelling??] attitude and trend of flaking. Making a promise is the same as attaching a personal stamp-of-approval or signature on something, which should be followed through. Especially upon seeing that person again. Grow some, and apologize. Flaking says so much about someone (more than they know or can comprehend).
This brings to question what do values mean? They are something that someone holds close to his/her heart. I understand that I cannot "force" my values on someone else. All I can do is stick to mine. When someone doesn't uphold similar values, I accept that. But when someone's values aren't respected, it's not respecting that person; and that's ultimately what I have a problem with. So, let me put this as ""socially acceptable"" as I can..."It's not the other person's problem that you're having a problem with that person's value differences." Which is nothing but a big pile.
I know that I am preaching to the choir, and that this isn't news to any of you; but it is something that I wish I can tell people about me, right-off-the-bat. My mood for this week, if you haven't guessed, is "Disappointed With People;" because it's becoming absolutely rare to find people who follow through. I guess this would be a good time to tell Joe that I'm sorry about not showing up for rock climbing in Yosemite 5 months ago. (Satire in italics)
The Life of a Student
The past couple of weeks have been super busy with work, school, and keeping up with my weekly responsibilities. Last Friday night, I actually found time (3 hours + no rain) to go to dinner and get in some bike riding with my friend, Brian. Good times. To keep this (and how needed/valuable it was) in perspective, that was the first time I've gone out since school started, back in January. I'm starting to get overwhelmed with everything, but I just gotta keep driving through it. I'm thinking about giving private saxophone lessons to bring in some extra money to ease finances. So I'll keep ya posted about that. Today is the first day of no rain since that day and it's supposed to be sunny until next Wednesday, so that'll lift my spirits big time. That's all for now, gotta get back to homework, practicing, and getting ready for our concert tonight.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Why I Couldn't Live In Oregon...Sorry Mom and Dad :)
So it's been raining for a full week now, and has been gray and wet out for about two weeks. Today, it unrelentlessly keeps falling from the sky; as if, in it's own way, saying, "I'm the new standard, get used to it sucka." I'm beginning to have withdrawals from not being able to support my mountain bike/sport bike addiction. I love clear skies. I love the beautiful contrast of colors that fill the sky throughout the day, as if a painting is continuosly being created just for us. I don't like this ceiling of clouds that seems to control my outdoor activities. But to counter all of this with an understanding of God's ever continuous balance of life, we need the rain.
Monday, January 19, 2009
If We Only Knew
So I've been reading "Wild at Heart" by John Eldredge. Interesting perspectives for sure. I'm reading chapter 7 and came across some scriptures of how God the Father looks at His children. Some of the versus were 1 Cor. 6:11, Rom. 8:1, Ps. 103:12. They made me think, "I think we'd look at God a lot differently if we knew the whole story." Sure, most of it is logged in the Bible. However, just as reading someone's book, doesn't mean that we truly understand what the author was feeling or going through at the time. I know that it would change my life perspective if I knew the "inside scoop."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
